Gazing into a partner's eyes creates a deep connection and builds trust between you. Try sitting opposite, holding each other's gaze without looking away. As you do, try to also breathe together, matching breath for breath. It won't be long before you can't hold back from reaching out to kiss or touch.
Talk to Me
Each of you writes down the five turn-on phrases you most adore - romantic, loving or naughty. Then take it in turns to give your partner a soothing massage, perhaps using a Durex Play pleasure gel gel, while repeating the turn-on phrases slowly, over and over.
Blindfold your partner and guide them round the room, allowing them to touch things on the way. Vary the textures you offer (smooth pane of glass, velvet curtain) and let them guess what they're touching. The fact of guiding and being guided will bring you closer, the need to guess will raise the guesser's sensitivity. If you feel like it, play this game naked.
The Big Hug
Set a timer for five minutes, and then move into a hug (sitting, standing, lying, whichever you choose). As you hug for longer and longer, your bodies will start to respond more deeply to each other's signals, so your breathing, heartbeat (and even blood pressure) start to synchronise. Keep the hugs going for the whole five minutes to get you feeling extra close.
Choose a sex-linked word or phrase that you both find arousing, maybe 'seductive', 'throbbing’ or 'nibble'. Then take it in turns to say another word the first one makes you think of. Try to make each word you think of even more arousing than the last one and say it in an even more arousing way.
Write to your lover, telling them just what you want to do to them and how. But don't send your letter an email - actually handwrite it, put it in an envelope, at a time of your choosing when your partner isn’t expecting it, drop it through the letter box. Tell your lover in advance what's on the way to them and watch anticipation build.
Do you hear me?
One of you closes their eyes. The other moves close and breathes, sighs, or moans softly. No words allowed - the game is to see how far you can turn each other on with just sounds alone. Try purring, directly into your partner's ear.
Discover your partner's favourite erotic book, then choose the scene you know will most turn them on. Lead them gently to the bed, or lay them back on the sofa... then read the scene aloud in a way calculated to get them most aroused. As you read, you can caress them, but they must simply listen without touching you until you've finished reading.
Play at being a couple at an exclusive adult party for 2. Buy a pair of beautiful, erotic masks - then wear them next time you make love.
Here's a low-risk way in to explore forbidden dreams. One of you asks the other twenty questions - answerable only by 'yes' and 'no', to discover one of your sexual fantasies. This way you don't need to go into detail - the answer only needs to be an idea like "I want to make love on a mountain top at sunrise...”
When you're really close to each other, your hormones kick in to boost your desire. So spend an hour, an evening, or if you can, a whole day - always touching. Hold hands, arms round waist, never be out of contact. If you think you'll forget and move apart, join wrist to wrist with a length of ribbon.
Explore the food of love as one of you is blindfolded; the other feeds them tiny morsels of different foods. The secret is to surprise each other with a variety of tastes, textures and temperatures - cold ice cream, warm soup. You could make this Breakfast in Bed!
Have ready at least ten different types of object - perhaps ice, a feather, a leather glove, a Durex toy, a rose - but don't let your partner see what you have. Blindfold them and touch them with each object. Can they guess what it is?
Screen your favourite sexy movie for your partner. Then pick the best scenes, say what turns you on, and - if you want - act those scenes out for yourselves.
Sit facing each other. One of you caresses her (or him) self in just the way she (he) likes, while the other partner mirrors the movements. This is not only a way to turn yourselves on but also to learn what arouses your partner.
Your Homework is...
Each of you sets the other a title for an erotic short story. Suggest who the lead characters might be (yourselves, a celebrity, a fantasy figure); the location (home, a medieval castle, a famous building), the period (which might not be present day) - and a deadline. You may want to set a forfeit to make sure you each hand your homework in on time!
What Shall I Wear?
For your next romantic night, one of you chooses the clothes the other should wear. It may not be - often won't be - what the wearer would choose themselves, but it will help you understand even more about each other's desires. So for just one night, wear what your lover wants to see you wearing.
Truth or Dare
Each of you writes down on separate pieces of paper five sexy questions you'd like your partner to answer, and five sexy dares you'd like them to fulfil. Fold the papers. Then each of you gets to choose either 'truth' or 'dare', open the folded paper and either answer the question or do the dare.
Take it in turns to complete a sentence which starts "My fantasy is..." and ends "but I prefer the reality of you..." And of course, if you find that you share the same fantasy, then it's fine to action it!
Find Your Fantasy
Take a whole afternoon to browse for sexual fantasy inspiration. Then choose three you're both intrigued by and - at the very least - discuss how you could put them into practice.
Dance with Me
Go to a dance lesson together - if you're absolute beginners, introduction classes are designed to get you dancing happily within the hour. Then, back home, use what you've learned to move together. If you want, do it naked.
One of you dances the other watches. The dancer's aim is to make it absolutely impossible for the watcher to hold back, so in the end they're impelled to reach out and touch.
Let Me Undress You
Each of you chooses a word or phrase to describe a way you would like to be undressed. It's best to choose a specific way, perhaps. 'Urgently'... 'Raunchily' 'as slowly as you possibly can'. The other of you delivers.
Take a sheet of A4 paper and on it draw a picture of something naughty that you've fantasised about doing with your partner. (Don't worry if you can't draw!) Cut the paper into sixteen square pieces and hide them round the house. Send your partner hunting for the pieces - you could give them a sexy reward for every one they find. When all sixteen pieces have been discovered, your partner can put the picture together then act out the fantasy.
Play a game of poker (or 'Snap' if your card skills are basic!). As in traditional 'strip poker', for each point you lose, you take off an item of clothing. But you have to do so in a way that most turns your lover on, while they have to applaud your act.
Choose three foods each that you really enjoy eating. Sit opposite and take it turns to eat 'at' each other as suggestively as you can. What effect does it have when she eats a banana? What effect does it have when he sucks a strawberry?
Choose your favourite food (pick carefully) and each fill a plate. But instead of heading for the dining room, make for the bedroom, spread a towel over the sheets, get naked and eat your dinner from each other's bodies. After dessert, take a raunchy shower together.
Start the day by promising your partner a night to remember. Text them regularly during the day to remind them of what's in store. Arrive home first, and leave a trail of tempting items (love notes... flowers... Durex massage gel... sex toys) leading to the bedroom where you are waiting - already undressed and ready to play.
The Erotic Audit
One of you lies perfectly still, the other touches from head to toe, covering every inch, no missing areas. The receiver murmurs numbers - from 1 to 5 where 1 is good and 5 is amazing - to reflect what feels best... what to do less of... what to do more of... what to keep doing more and more and more.
Decide a forfeit - like having to give the other oral sex. Then arrange a contest - a pillow fight, a tug of war, or anything that pits you against each other in playful competition. Whoever loses the struggle pays the forfeit, but in reality you’re both winners.
Pin Me Down
If your partner's into it, you can add an extra edge to any lovemaking by gently pinning them down. Adding this new element can provide extra physical sensation and pleasure.
Deck of Cards
From a pack of playing cards, take it in turns to choose one. If you choose spades, you get to be massaged, if clubs you get to be kissed, if diamonds your partner arouses you with their hands, if hearts they arouse you with their mouth. The higher the card, the longer the experience - number cards count in seconds
Can you pleasure your partner using only your mouth? Undress her with your teeth; place his condom on with your lips. Or rinse your mouth with tingling gel for extra sensation.
Faster… Harder… Slower… Softer
One of you lays still, the other touches every part; the receiver uses words to guide the toucher as to what kind of touch to use, and what speed and rhythm. Then move into more specific lovemaking, but with the receiver still using words to guide the action.
Choosing Her Spot
A game just for her. She chooses three sensitive parts of her body - Her partner creates a love experience using only those three spots and no other. Remember to add a Durex pleasure gel to make the experience even better.
Choosing His Spot
A game just for him. He chooses three sensitive parts of his body - His partner creates a love experience using only those three spots and no other. Remember to add a Durex pleasure gel to make the experience even better.
Write down, on a separate card for each, ten intercourse positions you like, and a series of timings from 3 minutes up to an hour. Then take it in turns to pull out two cards, one from each pile, to decide how you'll make love and how long you'll make it last. Don't forget your Durex condoms!
Run a bath as usual. One of you lies in, the other sits alongside and uses the shower attachment on the bather's body. Be prepared for a wet floor!
The Ultimate Massage
Get naked. Then one of you lies face down, and the other cover themselves in a pleasure gel (try Durex pleasure gels), lies on top, and uses their entire body as massage device, sliding up and down their partner. Then swap places. The one who climaxes most quickly gets to choose the next intercourse position. (You'll need a towel underneath to avoid marking the carpet or bed sheets)
All Around the House
Choose a room you've never made love in - or choose a room you have made love in but a way of making love you've never tried. She could lie back on the stairs while he straddles her. Or she could sit on the washing machine (spin cycle) while he enters between her legs.
Create an erotic story together where one of you starts and then you take it in turns to continue. The man might start: “I came home from work and saw you in the bedroom wearing your lacy black underwear. Slowly I stepped towards you ...” It’s then the woman’s turn to edge the narrative action forwards as you both share the role of storyteller, continuing to swap back and forth. Remember, as with any story, the devil is in the details.
Sound of Silence
Taking one of your senses out of the equation can heighten the intensity of touch. Get your partner to put on a pair of noise- cancelling headphones before sensually touching them in whichever way you choose. Temporarily removing sounds can help crank up the sensation of your touch on their skin. If you and your partner are game, you can also experiment with blindfolds as another way of stimulating their senses.
The game here is to make love with as little noise as possible. Can you climax without making a single sound? Build in a forfeit for whoever forgets themselves and moans!
Choose a piece of music that builds with a rising beat. Try to follow the rhythm of the music and build the speed and intensity of your love making and try to take your orgasms together at the precise climax of the music.
On the Edge
How close can you get to orgasm without actually coming? Get to the tipping point, then pull back and calm down... then work up again, keeping yourselves on the edge for as long as possible. Another variation of this game is when one of you tries your best to hold back from orgasm, while the other tries their best to bring them on.
Take your favourite Durex toy and a flashlight to bed. Once under the covers, shine the light precisely where you want your lover to caress you with the vibrator, moving the light when you want to shift the stimulation. Then return the favour so your lover holds the torch and you the vibrator.
The First Time
Imagine that one of you (or both of you) are making love for the very first time in your life. You're aroused and eager but have no idea what to do... so you'll need to be gentle and teach each other what works best.
Bound without Bonds
One of you takes charge, and tells the other precisely how to sit or lie - after which no movement is allowed even though they're 'captive' they are not tied down. The 'captor' then mercilessly pleasures their 'captive' - who still mustn't move. You get to decide whether if they do move, they get to miss their orgasm - or have one anyway!
Imagine a work environment where the boss's every wish is fulfilled. Now it's your turn. For the next hour, one of you follows the boss’s orders, in bed and out of it. The orgasmic reward is provided after sixty minutes - tomorrow, you change roles.
Mystery Meet Up
Leave home separately, but both end up at the same hotel bar. There, pretend you are strangers. Catch each other's eye, flirt from a distance, move closer, chat, start making out and eventually leave together. For added thrill, head for a hotel room which you've booked in advance.